I’m a sucker

I just can’t let it go when someone is being a dick towards me. I don’t know why I feel the need to address things like that, because it only makes things worse and I never learn. I fucking HATE drama. Like HATE IT. Internet or otherwise. Yet occasionally, about once a year, I end up in the middle of something because I don’t put up with bullshit and apparently delusionally think that my response will end it. [Edit: I also have a hard time because I fluctuate between being annoyed and laughing my ass off.]

Maybe I’m more pissed off because my one place to vent and be myself has a big kerfuffle about it then the actual event itself. I’m also a little bit more pissed off that I’m even involved at all. Anyway, I have to learn to not be so “oh yeah?!” because no one gives a shit about me defending myself, they only want to watch the spectacle and everything I say is put through the “internet drama” filter. It’s internet’s The Simple Life. So why bother? No one cares who I really am or what I have to say, the spectators just see the same argument they’ve seen 100 times and can’t either 1) stay out of it or 2) if they are going to get into it take 3 seconds to understand the individual circumstances.

But honestly when someone is making accusations about me that could be taken seriously by third parties, such as accusations of something that in real life is a crime — this is a situation where arguing over semantics is definitely necessary — I feel an obligation to address it in case it turns into something serious and so I’m not a doormat. Especially when I’m being personally attacked as if anything I’ve said on the internet has any bearing on my personality or worth in real life. It’s less that I care about what people like that think about me, it’s more that I worry that I’m going to become some community pariah if I let it go completely ignored. Probably though things would be better left alone.

New personal goal.

Gah.

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